I’ve been practicing setting healthy boundaries for over three years now. Initially, it used to feel scary, the thought of setting boundaries even with your loved ones or those you once loved but over time, I realised that it is okay to feel terrible about it and yet want to draw a line between yourself and anyone else.
It is important to protect your space; both internally and externally. That fear, that terrible feeling which sometimes feels like guilt is usually temporary and when you do in fact start seeing some positive shifts and change from learning to set healthy boundaries, that temporary feeling does disappear. Soon, you experience a very light, freeing feeling. I know this for sure.
I found peace in knowing that I’m doing what I’m doing for my the sake of my well-being and it always seemed worth it.
Setting healthy boundaries in your close and distant relationships is an integral part of self-care. It does not mean that you don’t tend to others. It means that you learn to tend to yourself first. Shifting your focus and attention towards what or who really matter frees up space and energy which can definitely be directed towards other greater things. There were many times in my life when events and situations around me made me feel helpless, as if there was no form of separation between me and others. I found that I was running low on energy for myself and that it was affecting my entire being.
It took me years to learn to set healthy boundaries and say ‘no’, firmly and politely where necessary.
Sometimes I catch myself slipping off my practice as well but I’m quicker to find my space and bring myself to stand my ground. You are allowed to go to any extent to ensure that your peace, solitude and sanity are well taken care of.
Here’s the thing about looking like a perfectly healthy individual when the truth is something else altogether
A bus has to wait for you to get into uber and the driver thinks you’re this fit and fine woman taking her own sweet time when you’re actually calculating every action and movement because both your shoulders are still hanging off loose and no body sees it.
You rush a little bit, your joints dislocate. Everyone’s fine. You’re not. Accidents happen and insurance companies might reimburse you a certain amount but that’s not going to get you your health back.
Well, you can’t expect every other person on the street to know your story and that’s unrealistic. I’m writing this post based on nothing but fear, a very natural fear that doesn’t paralyse me mentally or emotionally (or even physically) but serves as a reminder to stay fully aware because that’s all I can do to protect myself. That’s all anyone with any form of disability can really do. And yet, despite all your awareness and presence, things happen. Shit can go wrong because there are so many other factors at play too.
Point being, let fear serve and guide you instead of letting it paralyse you. Acknowledge fear as a self-protection mechanism and do what’s needed from there. Whoever says they’re not afraid of anything are definitely lying to themselves and the world.
Peanut Butter + Strawberry Jam on a Rice Cake
With my appetite being on the low side for the last few months, and now that I am finally back from a holiday, I had to find ways to make sure I don’t stuff my body (because my stomach seriously can’t handle it) while ensuring that I am still eating something.
Any form of grains tend to cause me too much bloating and heaviness in my gut but because I do have other pain medications to take other than just the antibiotics for SIBO, I try to at least have something relatively light and easy on my gut. There’s no SIBO specific diet I need to follow for now.
Over the last one week or so, I’ve observed that a piece of rice cracker doesn’t seem to over-bloat me and fills me up just enough to keep my body functioning. It’s been working well for now and plus, there is just no limit to the different toppings you can enjoy it with!
Sour Cream + Sun-dried Tomatoes paste + Black Pepper on a Brown Rice + Chia Seeds cake. So freaking delicious!
My friend and I decided to make these hoping that perhaps its ingredients list was enticing enough to make me hungry. Besides, since I’ve been feeling very low on energy too, we thought one energy ball might suffice for the times I totally can’t stand any other food.
Unfortunately, I’m starting on a new batch of medicines today and have some dietary restrictions to follow. Hence, I decided to pack these up and give them away to my friends and family instead.
Really simple ingredients and super easy to make.
Here’s what you need:
- Pitted dates (1/3 cup)
- Fresh raspberries (1/2 cup)
- Shredded coconut (3/4 cup)
- Any nut butter of your choice (1/4 cup)
- Raw almonds (1/2 cup)
All you have to do is put all these ingredients into a blender, one at a time, give it a nice final blend and that’s it – roll out tiny balls out of this blended mixture, coat them with more shredded coconut and refrigerate for about 30 minutes before serving.